Retarded USC Girl

Christmas and well, holidays in general tend to suck when you have lost loved ones or others have gone crazy. But this year - I had such fun. I really had an amazing time. I went to my brother's house Friday night... and i left this morning to drive in to work. It is dead here at work... I am trying to update a filing cabinet and calling patients who are apparently still on vacation. Aunt Berta came in for the holiday.... what fun she is.

As children, we used to get so excited when we knew Aunt Berta was coming to visit... as adults, we still do. She is the Aunt you always want to grow up to be like. She is amazingly fun. We sat in the garage and watched the rain while drinking coffee and smoking too many cigarettes. We laughed and talked about sexual perversions (not our own) and life in general.

We came to the conclusion that my dad is most likely crazy like the skank whore he was married to (Carol - not my mother). See, I am so hostile. I told my dad the other night that she was a stupid cunt. He knows it's true, but I think deep down he is depserate. He NEEDS to be in a relationship. I dont think he can forge life alone. Some people cant. Maybe when you are married for so long, you become so used to being a piece of a whole as opposed to an individual, a module in a family unit ... he has been Daddy for so long now... maybe when you lose the person that makes you complete, you are never really whole again. He doesnt look at her pictures or talk about her. He tries not to remember when. Maybe it's too painful to remember what you had and lost. So, he settles for the dime store whore down the street. Maybe....

But even with all that drama, we had such a great holiday. We laughed, drank, and ate until we could hold no more. It was truly the best Christmas since mom died. The house was decorated, the stockings were hung by the chimney with care.... the fireplace roared... Santa left toys for Bowen .... you should have seen his sweet little face when he saw his rocky horse, basketball goal, and trike,.... all the little trucks, and the Mrs. Potato Head, Elmo... ahhh, it was so much fun. He played for hours.... He was not feeling his best... chest congestion. I kissed on him anyway and now I'm sick too, but it was worth it. Sometimes, you cannot hug a child enough.

He sat in my lap and watched Family Guy and Fraggle Rock on youtube. He loves Brian and Peter. He is so damn adorable. We also watched the video of the guy who dies from getting ramrodded by the horse... my Aunt wanted to see it. OH -n we showed my oldest nephew 2girls1cup. I almost didint make it through... God, that thing is rough. :)

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas. Remember Scrooge, he said he would carry Christmas in his heart all year long and live it every day? What a nice idea.....

Merry Crimmis, Yall!

posted by Ashlyn @ 7:34 AM