Retarded USC Girl

I am sick... still sick. My throat is on fire and throbbing. My head is aching, my muscles are sore.. my nose is in pain -- its like the Hoover dam - o - snot. I feel like hammered shit. I want pajamas, juice, coffee, and narcotics. That is all I want right now.... God, all the times I have been really healthy and taken it for granted. I am such a loser.

MY throat kills me every time I swallow. DAMMIT I hate this. I want Nyquil... Nyquil and sleep... I am going to my parents' on Saturday evening.... after work. I want them to take care of me, let me sleep, and make me feel better. I hurt....

I remember when I was a little kid.... my mom had these tupperware cups... there were little tan ones and a blue one and an orange one. I remember how they smelled when they came out of the dishwasher. Whenever I was sick.... Mama would give me some coke in one of those tupperware cups and some tylenol or dimetapp and saltines. I would lay on the couch and she would check my temp and say "bless your heart". I could use a little of that right now.

I am always in such a rush to grow up... when I was a kid and I would play house or something, I would pretend I was "20" years old. I remember when 20 was an adult... and now that I have surpassed that, I dont think it is that damn old. I still feel like that little girl who would lay on the couch with her teddy bear.... under a blanket with her mama there.

This is just one of those days where you want to wind back the clock, slow down the pace, recall old memories, and relive them. Its in the way that Christmas is more fun when you are a kid, being barefoot outside was a good idea, burying a new sandal that wasnt recovered until 3 years later was an even better idea.... and in the way that coke from a tupperware cup and saltines tasted better back then... made u feel better.

I am going home tomorrow after work.... I am sick and I need that Tupperware cup and those saltines and my mama :) [those narcotics would be nice as well ;)]

posted by Ashlyn @ 4:35 PM