Retarded USC Girl

I still want the things or people that I cant have.... and I think that because of that character flaw... I am never ever really going to be happy. Maybe for a while... for a brief moment, but in the end the fact remains that I simply want too much. So, here is to wanting too much,....

posted by Ashlyn @ 8:35 PM 0 comments

When I get bored.... I get creative. So, since Bobby has been unfuckable as of late... I decided to go buy a large pair of panties and melt a snickers bar in the ass of them..... I then hung them on the handle of his door. Classic. That was one of the highlights of today.

So, last night was Valentines. What did I do, you may ask? Well, as odd as this may seem.... I went to have beer and dinner with a really cool (not to mention hot) individual named Mike. Fun fun dude... really funny. Then I went to Red Iguana with Julie for some beer and dancing. Julie, in a bold maneuver, approached sport coat guy. It was awesome.

I am sleepy as fuck and I think that I am gonna go lay down. :)

Oh, dont you hate when you call someone a loser for doing something..... and you then turn around and do the exact same thing.... ahhh good times. good times. Whew, I am sleepy. Good night, Moon.

posted by Ashlyn @ 9:05 PM 0 comments

The funny thing about writing this is that I forget that other people read it. It is a reflex action for me. I have to come here and I have to write it all down.... and I am not sure why really. It makes sense to me - and that is important. Things should make sense as often as possible, because in the great scheme of things, nothing really makes any sense at all - not in the big picture. So, I come on here virtually every day and i type. type type type. The little keys just clanking away. My fingers rapidly brushing each one.

You know, for a long time, I wanted to be a writer... and then I decided against it... who would read the shit in my head? I mean - I dont wanna mass market to weirdos, but the more you think about it... deep down, we are all weirdos... there are social norms that we all do not conform to on some level. My mom wanted me to be a writer. Did I ever mention that? She liked to read the things I had written - to include this blog even. I miss her. I had an amazing dream about her the other night. I rarely dream about her... and that breaks my heart, I am so thankful for the dreams of her that I do have, but in all of my dreams, she is dead. I think my heart knows that pretending she is alive and then waking up to discover that is not real would kill her all over again and I dont think I could take that.

So, back to the point... I write this silly little blog and I forget that people read it until someone reminds me or reads something and realizes that I am sad at times, but hey - we all are. I am happy 90 - 95 percent of the time, but if I was happy every minute of every day, I wouldnt appreciate it. How could I? So, I get online and I write... I write for an audience of sorts, but mainly for myself I think. I type and type until I have said my peace and then you will stumble on here and read a random entry. That is why I am so honest on here. Not because I have never told a lie, but because if I am honest... even about the moments when i am hurting... if I am honest about that, and you stumble on here and you feel the same way at that very moment and you understand.... if you can relate, well then it was worth it.

So what if I look like a pansy at times. So what. Who the fuck cares? To you I am most likely a little box edged in pink with black words inside. ... when in reality I am the most fabulous chica ever! lol.

I am gonna go pick up Julie... who recently discovered an entry on my covert lil blog -hence this post - the things that I write are what I hold true.... I am honest on here... always.... the problem is this: just because I am honest, does not mean that I am right.

posted by Ashlyn @ 8:25 AM 1 comments

Man... I need to give a recap. You know when it has been a while since someone has been laid... it is kinda the same thing as someone who has gone without food for a long time... the minute ass/food is in sight... they overindulge. This, my friends, was the case last night when Julie got railed by the UT boy.

For the first time in... I dont know how long... I am thinking EVER.... Yours truly was the fucking wingman. Now, when I say wing man... I dont mean that a lesser piece of ass was peddled my way.... no no... I mean wing man in the truest sense of the word.... one who facilitates the ass happening.... I took Jos, the kid out of the house for over 2 fucking hours while her mom got railed six ways from sunday. I am a good damn friend.

So, while Julie is limping along today... I am skipping about... jealous as hell that she got hooked up with Olaf's other American cousin.... but in the end, I am happy for the chica... she deserved a nice piece of ass... afterall, she jumped on the bomb for me... when I needed to hook up with bobby... she hopped on his hamster dick friend.

posted by Ashlyn @ 4:02 PM 0 comments

It is snowing again. You know the other day I was wishing for snow - and we have gotten it three times since then. So - all this time I have been crossing those fingers and wishing for some ass - so when is that one gonna come through?!!!

posted by Ashlyn @ 7:08 AM 1 comments